What a Mess!

A most infamous end to a crazy 2015... With high and low lights throughout the year, this moment was the most physically painful of 2015.  Well then again... I think the little Norovirus bug I got on Christmas.  Go figure the end of 2015 was in general painful on all levels and in all ways, mental, physical, heart and soul.  This moment, however, is physically stamped into my life.  

Who would have thought taking my pup out to potty, would land me in the ER? 

The basic story goes like this... A simple single choice... I was walking Dakota late at night or more like early early morning.  Since he has been sick, I try to give him as much time outdoors as possible.  When I got back to go in, Montana was at the door.  I had taken her out earlier at our more typical time, so she didn't need to go out again.  And I thought I would just go to bed.  Instead, that guilt led to that fateful decision.  I took her to go potty.  Who would have thought there was anyone out at 1 am in the morning?  Let alone someone else walking their dog?  

Well there was.  Montana was getting fussy at the presence of the other dog and I had her on a retractable leash.  Long finger to shorter... Montana lunged and the ring finger of my free hand got caught in a loop in the rope leash.  The next thing I know was a sharp pain but I didn't expect the GUSH of blood.  It was dark, but I knew this was bad.  So I collected myself and Montana and led her back to the house.  The blood trickled onto the path and in my confusion I left a few ounces on the entrance to the house.  I got my wits about me, put Daki and Tana into their space, tried to call some folks, but at 1:30 am I wasn't getting anyone awake.

So I drove myself to ER.  Fortunately Sharp Memorial ER is close to my house.  

My crazy head saw the parking structure but I had to ask the attendant if they take credit cards.  He said this is where you park for ER, and if you are admitted you wouldn't have to pay.  So I parked and walked in... 

The folks at the desks were cool as they asked "What can we do for you?... there's blood."  I basically said yes that's me.  And I went on to explain this retractable leash pinch of my finger.  I have to say I realize I can stay pretty calm.  I handle public pain with humor.  I mean I don't get mean, I get giddy and goofy over the gruesome.  So they put me in the ob/gyn room?  Yeah, there's no way I would need to be in there, but that's where they put me.  First thing they did was check my bones by taking XRays.  Here's the best example of giddy goofy.  When they asked me to hold my thumb and index finger than spread the rest of my fingers, the tech asked can you do that without pain?  

And I said, "oh yeah I can still throw up the gang signs."  

The nurse was a cool Filipino dude and he checks out my finger... And he says "oooh that's gonna hurt."  I'm thinking "yay something to look forward to... "  Later he mixes up this betadine concoction and says place your hand in there.  I tried and tried... but each time I would breathe rapidly and heavily and say "Are you for real?"  It was like that stuff was pouring down into my open wound, the wound where I could see a little bone!  He pulls the bin away from me, wraps my finger then tells me to dip again.. Ah that's better I can do this.

Well I basically had a 2 hour wait for the hand specialist.  In that time, they weren't gonna give me narcotics unless I confirmed a ride home.  They were worried I would be driving out of there.  So I went to my phone texting everyone I could think of and calling my parents to no avail... I even went on Facebook to see if anyone was online late.  Fortunately, Tos was the first responder.. 

So I waited and almost fell asleep in that betadine solution.  Before I knew it my hand doc came in, and 2 steps behind was Tos.  Perfect timing.  Tos was put to work.  The doc asked her to get a tray.  She just didn't know from where... hahaha 

Well the doc was quick to assess my finger tip issue.  I basically needed a skin graft to cover the big gaping hole in my finger.  The choices?  I could have 2 fingers grafted and attached or I could take it from my butt... I quickly responded.. 

"I'll take the BUTT!"

I really did respond quickly to that option, because I couldn't imagine my fingers stitched down to other parts of my hand.  However, my quick response definitely won some laughter.  Before I knew it they had me on my side, but I couldn't reach over to pull my pants down.  That's when your best friend being by your side is the coolest thing in the world.  Well not coolest thing, but ain't no shame. She helped pull my pants and my hippy cheek was exposed.  

So what's up with the multi-prick attack of my booty... Prick 1, 2, 3, 4...  I lost count.  Numbing the area for the graft and I proceeded to watch as the scalpel broke the skin.  Morbid curiosity... yes.  Strangely I probably could have gone into medicine of some sort, but I don't like poop and vomit... Ugh... That's why I think the Norovirus problem a week ago was way worse than this ER visit.

Well... next was pricks to my finger and that long needle definitely left a bit more pain.  That's when my Tos hooked up the high five hand hold with synchronized screeching... We had to explain to the nurse that we're kung fu ninja friends and our ninja-ness was gonna get us through this... 

Everyone was sharing stories over the surgery... the other nurse didn't like nail problems, the doc was commenting on how some people don't want to think.  It was cool.  I watched him put my butt on my finger and stitch it up.  Butterfinger... yes... 

In the end... I survived that craziness.  Thanks to Tos for keeping me company.  Grateful to have a late night workaholic best friend.  The stories and the pictures will be forever imprinted in my left ring finger tip.

Kid Again!

Visiting Murrieta means playtime!  Yay for kids.  This time around Moe came along and Lani hung out with us.  Played football, soccer.  We played with some neighborhood kids... made friends at the park... Great day to be a kid!

Kickin' the Dust Up with Luke Bryan

Thanks for an awesomely fun concert!
Another great evening with very cool people and very cool country music!  Thanks to Courtney for the invite and the ride, thanks to Amanda for hooking up the parking and the lawn entertainment (see below), thanks to Kayla for buying and holding the tickets and for luring the one dude over who was trying to hook up with you... that was hilarious... thanks to Lindsey for insisting on bringing the blanket.






Play It Again!
Yes, I like country on occasion.  I have to say I didn't really know Luke Bryan's songs about a month ago.  So one Courtney invite later, Luke has a new fan.  I picked up what his concert playlist and "Play(ed) it again" and again and again.  I have to say the music is fun and I love the words of all the songs.  There's definitely a lot of drinking involved, in the songs that is.  So who would've thought I was going country for a night... Not me... I'm hip hop, R&B.  However, I have to say when I saw Luke do the Smule duet with Jason Derulo, I figured he would be cool...

Head's up! game in the parking lot.  To pass the time and in between people watching, mostly watching to pee up the hill... We played "head's up"... Apparently we're only good at "Acting Out"...


Culture Shock
I think the most hilarious part of the night for me... CULTURE SHOCK!  So my friends were talking about what they would be wearing for the concert earlier that week... And I kept hearing BOOTS and FLANNELS.  I understood the boots completely... but the flannel thing...  From where I grew up, people who wore flannel were in gangs hahahah.  Seriously... and they would button only the 1st button with a wife beater underneath.  So the flannel thing was a bit perplexing... Boots, cut-off jeans, and sleeveless flannels heck any flannels... Yeah... so when we were driving into the parking lot... My head did a bit of a tilt... and I realized what country is... I mean I've gone line dancing before and I've seen cowboy hats... and I've seen people on occasion dress country... but... I was a bit wow'ed by it all... I think the only thing that I was trippin' out on were the cut-off jeans and boots on this one dude...  I mean he can wear whatever he wants... but I think that look looks way cuter on girls... hahaha

The Lawn and GUARDIN' show
So the "not sure what the name of it is anymore" Amphitheater is a cool little venue and Amanda hooked up the right parking lot for quick in-n-out privileges.  However, this lawn concept is pretty entertaining.  I've been to many a show, but I've always had a seat.  So this whole lawn thing was interesting.  Good thing Lindsey brought the blanket and good thing the blanket was a light color.  We used it to stake out space... For the opening acts (Dustin and Randy, they were great by the way), it was manageable.. We would stand, the blanket would be there behind us... The closer and closer to Luke time... all of a sudden the blanket was curling and people were nudging us away from it.  By the time Randy Hauser was finished, it was pretty much rolled up but we managed to get some sitting time before Luke.  The most entertaining part was watching Amanda protect her space with her legs outstretched... And the under-the-breath, Yoda like subliminal conversations she was having with people encroaching on our space.  She became a compass for all the people looking for their friends.  They would all stop at her boots and use their phone.  She would proceed to use her barely audible (in a concert setting) voice to shoo them away... And it worked.  However, a group of girls streamed into space, hurdling Amanda's legs while Court took a picture.  And all I could think... they're gonna trip on Amanda... So for a good 15 minutes laying on the lawn, Amanda was guardin'.

The COUNTRY
Awesome awesome entertainer... 1st off Luke was battling a cold and he was strugglin' at times, but still pulled off a great show.  You gotta give him props because in the state he was in.. he still sounded excellent.  And that white boy can move... His music makes you wanna move... and he does move well.. Mad props!  His setlist was fun.. and I totally appreciated his hip hop/r&b references... Gotta love how music connects people.  I loved all the songs, because I studied his set list.  At least I could sing along... Dustin and Randy came out and sang Sugar with Luke.  That was fun!


In-N-Out
Post concert, we bolted out of the venue and the parking lot.  Headed out to in-n-out and was a bit tripped up that I just had in-n-out just the day before.  The time warp of anticipation and a concert definitely throws off all semblance of what a day is... Seriously it felt like a Saturday concert...

Drunk on You!
So yes... I'm a new fan.. So I had to learn at least one of his songs on the guitar..

Daily Daze - October 14, 2015

Thought of the Day
You live your life in the present, hope for a brighter tomorrow, but sometimes you just have to admire the footprints you've left behind. There's already something wonderful about JUST BEING YOU!  When you're real, that truth does set you free.  You are your optimal self when you let your soul shine.  However, sometimes you misplace that shine.  Today, so many folks reminded me of my shine!  So thanks... it was full of joy, laughter and gratitude!

There were some cool conversations which made me realize that I'm actually living this life, and setting the tone for who I want to be...

1.  A Gift or two!

This week I was blessed with kid art!  In both cases, totally unwarranted and from a distance.  It's kinda surreal to think that just by being cool to a kid and treating them like a real person and respecting them and their space, you get to be remembered.  I'm a big kid, so all I want to do is play.  And I'm so blessed to be around some of the coolest kids on the planet!  So when they show gratitude in their beautiful little ways, you gotta be like ... "damn I must be doing something right."  All I ever do is treat kids like how I would treat my friends.  You gotta give people time to acclimate to you, so you're approachable and interesting.  You gotta give people space, so they don't feel suffocated by your affection.  You gotta give people that room to be and grow.  And you gotta help them to learn and open up to learning from them. I know for a fact I learn more from kids than I will ever learn from adults.  Kids see the world in simple, fascinating ways.  I love analysis... All analysis really boils down to is being a little kid looking at the world as if you never knew the world!  Kids have the best and most honest view of the world... We grow into seeing through dirty spectacles, but KID EYES are CLEAR... So of course I'm gonna cherish their little brains and eyes... I wish I could just be a kid for life!

2.  Where did that SPICE come from?

Had a totally fun time hanging with friends, eating Indian buffet!  There's something hugely entertaining about partitioning your plate with the variety of sauced up meat and veggies, only to eat one thing, have your mouth be so SPICED up that you can recall which thing you thought you ate that made it spicy... AND YOU STILL EAT UP THE WHOLE THING!  Thank goodness for the cream of mushroom...   So the gift of SPICING UP YOUR LIFE, doesn't come up in just what you eat.  It's in the INNUENDO of speech!  hahaha "Riding Sticks", "Mischief Management" and "Pacific Beach in East Los".  I'm telling you now... WORDS MEAN SOMETHING... but sometimes WORDS MEAN MORE!!! So our spice world was filled with fun conversations.  And on the ride home... See some WORDS on a TATOOED MAN!

3.  Virtually Real Conversations
I had a great conversation with a friend about Virtual Reality and how we can be so consumed in the escapism of a virtual happiness, that we would forego living this existence.  I know escape and entertainment and I would love to play the day away.  However, I've come to understand something about this life, you have to CHOOSE TO LIVE IT.  Otherwise, it lives you and you don't see the gifts.  My friend posed the question if you could live a happier virtual existence, wouldn't you want to live it instead of live your life.  I thought about it.  Just like any ADDICTION that keeps you in a never ending EUPHORIA, it will lead to an untimely demise.  You have to wonder.  If you believe in the SOUL and that this body, mind and heart is the vessel we are constrained to use to fulfill this life, then you really couldn't be sated by the virtual reality.  However, if you don't have a soul, and you are biding time with this body, mind and heart... Then you may as well succumb to that false reality, but at that point why continue to be alive?  A good conversation which served up few answers and delivered ever more questions, which may never be answered.  However, the BEST PART of the conversation... WAS THE CONVERSATION.  We weren't engaged with our mobile devices... We were engaged in a conversation... The GIFT of GAB...

4.  Bucket Lists
It's not about having a bucket or a list... It's about approaching the world and saying "HEY WORLD, THIS IS WHAT I WANT!"  and maybe, just maybe speaking aloud what you truly want of this world will be returned ten-fold.

5.  Talking to Yourself
Do it, but don't be rude.  We all have our inner mind... We all have our multi-level thinking methods.  We manage conversations outwardly and inwardly.  So be "WARD-LY"... and WORLDLY.  Don't auto-google the answer... Think and talk it out with yourself.  Break down a problem, see it's points of truth, create and find the patterns.  The last thing you ever want to do is depend on a friggin' "WE ARE ONE, BORG BRAIN" - COLLECTIVE... ahem the world wide web... and BELIEVE THAT IS THINKING!  We aren't BEES!  We aren't the BORG!  We aren't PACKS of WOLVES.  There is no WE in I... hahaha At the same time, I CAN'T DO IT ALONE...

So talk to yourself...then talk to others.  Engage yourself... Engage with others...

Note to self... VIRTUAL means "NOT QUITE" ...

So I choose QUITE a LIFE, not a VIRTUAL one... With all this living, there comes JOY and PAIN (pump it up pump it up)... QUIZ if you got this far who sang that song?  But hey... I believe in a soul, I believe I'm a newbie soul... and I believe I have this vessel to navigate the murky waters of life looking for the natural spring.  For when you get closer to that source, the debris will subside and the waters will clear... You'll know why you WERE HERE.

Recruiting Time - San Marcos

There's something awesome about being able to talk to students and help them on their path.  There is definitely something inspiring and rewarding in knowing how far you've come.  There's also something to be said for talking about the company you work for and the people you work with and realizing that we are and can make a difference.  Sometimes it is easy to forget the small things and the small blessings.
Thanks to the crew for an awesome time.  Thanks for the memories, the quizzes for a nickel, 5 for a quarter, the way you can apply modeling to everything you do, the students that give you hope for the next time around, the cart guy who hooked us up with the ride so we wouldn't have to be lugging around the banner he showed up to and fro, to the fun conversations, to the laughs... To a good afternoon lunch and to a complete day.

Sometimes you have to sing and dance

Sometimes there's no relief from your mind.  So you have to let your soul free, let your body move and let your song be sung.  Getting too wrapped up in your head and feeling your heart can only drive you crazy.  So I'm grateful I can let it go...

Belmont Park Fun Night

Blast to the past!!!  Visiting old haunts with cool new friends.  Hitting up Sandbar with Drama, Court-es and Kenny Lee.  Then kicking it old school with bumper cars and the Dipper!  Fun times.

Daily Daze - May 18, 2015

Topic 1 - Being There... 
em·pa·thy

ˈempəTHē/

noun

1.  The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

com·pas·sion

kəmˈpaSHən/

noun

1. sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.

   
   

So even if you have empathy and compassion, it is an entirely different thing to act on it appropriately.  If you really think about it, the problem, the issues and the sympathy are not directed to you.  So what do you do when someone you care for is hurting?  What do you do when you want to reach out, but you don't want to dig too deep?  Such the quandary.  The truth is you turn inwardly and search for how you would want to be handled and cared for.  However, projecting that truth onto someone else probably won't work.  We're different.  So what do you do?  You feel empathy and you are compassionate, but what does it look like?  And who are we trying to help?

Simple reality:
*  Let the person know you are there and care
*  Open your arms as widely as possible, but allow them to walk in
*  Hold them when they need to be held
*  Encourage them when they need to be challenged

We can't protect each other from pain.  We can only help to endure, heal and recover from the pain.

Topic 2 - Being Square... or rectangle or circle or <<fill in shape>>
Finding someone else is really all about acknowledging one's self
Had a fun conversation which led to a simple idea

*  Know who you are right now - be open to acknowledge your successes, failures, bright lights and dim moments
*  Know who you want to be - see your future self, so that you can endure all the challenges which will get you there.
*  Know who you want to be surrounded by - see your family and friends

I basically thought... if you at least got these things in mind, the "RIGHT PERSON" will find their way to you.

Knowing who you are now with all the flaws, allows you to be the most real person to whomever you are introducing yourself to...
Knowing who you want to be, allows you to accept the challenges that well intentioned people will lay before you to move you in that direction
Knowing who you want in your life is the true destination.  In that circle is where you want "the one" to be.

It's funny how we get so stressed, depressed and obsessed with wishing on a star.  When all along the star is waiting to break through inside of you.  When you live your life with your ideals and your God given being... amazing people will come into and out of your life.

At least it's fun to think you have control somewhere in this world...

Reality Changers Scholarship Presentation

Attending an SDGE sponsored event to support Reality Changers.  

TLC on The Main Event Tour 2015 - Compilation Video Done

I had the awe inspiring pleasure to watch TLC live in Anaheim on May 2, 2015 and San Diego on May 11, 2015.  I was blown away by the memories of some of the greatest hits in R&B, Hip Hop and Pop.  TLC embraces what it means to be a woman and what it means to be empowered by that privilege.  Tionne "TBoz" Watkins and Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas and the powerful memory of Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes makes this trio forever inspiring.

This concert brings home some of my roots that I have forgotten.  It's not just a throwback concert... It's a soul revival for who I was and I have always wanted to be as an adult.  TLC music brings you home and carries you forward.  Much love to TLC,  the TLC family of fans, dancers and crew that bring these concerts to life.

A Pitch Perfect 2 Friday Night

I don't do Friday nights typically.  However with assigned seating it makes it way more doable.  Post workout, went to movies with Courtney and Amanda, plush seats at the theater reclining and all.  Pre movie dinner with Pozookie (yikes) at BJ's.

Note it rained in San Diego the last day and a half, much needed water.  However, the sun broke through as it was setting.

Pitch Perfect 2 - Aca Awesome

It's always tough to follow up a breakout hit movie.  They did this sequel justice.  Cool music, awesome acapella, funny funny funny.  Anna Kendrick always impresses, Rebel Wilson is unabashed, Britney Snow and the rest of the crew brought the fun back.  Hailey Stanfield was a new edition but a good edition...  This song definitely sticks with you as well.

Shout out to the Filharmonics who are a Filipino acapella group who represent... Basically it was good enough for me to download the soundtrack and Filharmonics album plus share the video to Flashlight.

Check it out!

May 11, 2015 NKOTB and TLC again in San Diego

Fabulous show!

Wipeout SD 2015 - High Rollers

Can't beat a great day of obstacles and fun with friends.

NKOTB and TLC: The Main Event 2015 @Anaheim Honda Center

This was an amazing show!  Hit it off right by going with my friends Rana and Michelle. It was like a concert dream come true.  I love NKOTB and I love TLC!!!  I grew up listening to their music, but more importantly I probably learned a lot from Hangin' Tough and not chasing Waterfalls.  All I can say is that I didn't realize how much watching them meant to me, until it happened!  So I have to say I'll be loving you (NKOTB and TLC) forever!

Loved the show so much... I'll be watching in San Diego as well!

Awesome music with awesome peeps!

Ingress Level 6!

Eclipsed into the next level!

Visiting with baby

Meeting Jessica's baby

Kingsman and Ingress

Fun day of movies and Ingress Level up!  Watched Kingsman with Michelle and Justin, then played Ingress at Balboa Park with Justin!  By the way, couldn't resist the photo op with Shailene Woodley and Theo James!!!  I am DIVERGENT!

Kingsmen is literally a kick ass, better the Kill Bill but just as violent type of movie!  Well played!

Controversy of the Year: Blue/Black, White/Gold?

It was all about a dress and what your head was compensating for or not?!

Best online and offline conversation.. So much so, they created a Bitmojii!!!

Strangely enough I initially saw white and gold, eventually saw the blue and black and now my mind can't make up its mind... I see both at different times of the day or different moods of the day!